I get so depressed about Medium, then I read things like this. Your dad sounds like a great man, Greyson.

By the time I got to the last picture, I was laughing so hard.

Picture 1: Beet shaving chips, assorted fish roe on a bed of crab lung foam, freeze-dried seaweed garnish

Picture 2: Airport lounge with plastiwood panels & granite countertop slab tables

Picture 3: Purple potato Pringles on avocado foam, Bermuda grass garni

Picture 4: Excess antique foam rocks from "Land of the Lost," gnarled Andean potato of the Gods

Picture 5: Mango/acorn squash sorbet dusted with ground cannabis "Martian" style

Picture 6: Aged orange and green pork rinds on a bed of sheep's milk crema, freeze-dried rhubarb strip garni

Picture 7: Yak liver pate en-roque topped with hot and mild Chee-to dust.

Picture 8: My guess? Radish slices surrounding a glob of llama kidneys, on a bed of apricot reduction

Picture 9: A Klingon dessert or the item in the back of the walk-in.

"This guy won't know ..."